Things I would tell my younger self…

  • God loves you even when you feel unworthy…no…especially when you feel unworthy!

  • Obsessively restricting foods/calories will only lead to uncontrollable binges – don’t do it!

  • Self esteem is exactly what is says…it comes from yourSELF.

  • You are more than the number at the back of your jeans – be more, do more!

  • You are not what happened to you – forgive them.

  • Stop feeling sorry for yourself – you’re too interesting for that!

  • Forgiveness will set you free. Forgive them. Forgive yourself. Just forgive!

  • You will never please everyone all the time – focus on pleasing God.

  • Be a good person but don’t waste your time trying to prove it.

  • Bad company really does corrupt good character.

  • Your Natural hair is beautiful – treat it well.

  • You are different – embrace it.

  • Don’t take yourself too serious – laugh and laugh loud!

  • You might not have known the love of an earthly father but you will learn to know God’s unconditional love and it will change you.

  • You do not need validation to be you.

  • God saved you from a dying bed when doctors said it was over – there is NOTHING He cannot do!

  • You will marry a man who loves you regardless of your weight.

  • You don’t need a lot of friends (the few you have are true).

  • Your purpose is bigger than you – get out of your own way!

  • The very thing you consider a curse is also a blessing (feeling deeply).

  • You are creative – Stop doubting & write, write, write!

  • Drink more water.

  • Dark chocolate is actually quite good.

  • Don’t wait until you’ve lost weight to buy clothes.

  • You can look good at any size.

  • Knowledge is power – chase it!

  • Meekness isn’t weakness – don’t let people make you hard.

  • Stay kind and be kind to yourself too!

  • You will come into your own – be patient.

  • Learn to say NO without explaining yourself.

Jeans & Shirt Dress – Donna | Vest – PnP Clothing | Boots – The Fix | Bag – MRP | Earrings – Jems Of A Natural

Life @ 35

I have been trying to get this blog post out for days but this flu/sinusitis/infection just wont leave me alone!!!

I celebrated my birthday a few days ago – well…”celebrated” is probably overzealous since I spent the day in bed cuddled up to a box of tissues, pills and orange juice, however, it was my birthday and I’m always grateful for another year of God’s grace!

I’m 35 – eeek!!!! Now, I don’t say that out of fear of aging – I actually love most things that come with aging (operative word being most).

Here’s a list of notable changes – some good, some not so!

  1. Rest is vital – in my 20’s I could survive and function on very little sleep, I healed from sickness or even major ops like my cesarean much quicker than in my 30’s. This past week I had no choice but to take 2-3days in bed just to get over this flu and I mean flat in bed, doing nothing – not even social media!

  2. Signs of aging – Fine lines and dry skin under my eyes have me googling eye creams – and they don’t come cheap y’all – I totally regret every time I rubbed my eyes, damaging that delicate under eye skin – I’m much gentler now (since seeing how expensive those creams are).

  3. Dry skin – I’ve always had oily skin and would skip heavy creams and lotions especially in the summer time but these days I find that half way through the day I’m looking like an ambassador for Lacoste – which also has me googling body butters – I’m such an adult (googling stuff!).

  4. Taste buds – This one is surprising – the older I get the more my palate changes – I now enjoy an array of veggies that I didn’t like in previous years.

  5. Counting pennies – I had a habit of mindlessly buying things for the sake of having new stuff or staying trendy but since trying to live more with less (that happens when you hit mid 30’s – you become all philosophical and stuff) I mostly buy quality, timeless and necessary items (also…I have 3 Kids and private schooling is expensive so I’ve become a cheapskate) – no shame in my game!

  6. Self awareness – I love how aware you become of yourself. Who you’re hanging around, what you’re listening to, what you’re reading, your thoughts, your words. It has brought a sense of peace to my life that I’m so grateful for. Yay for aging!!!

  7. No – It was never a word I could say (except to my kids). But I’m learning that it’s necessary for my sanity and emotional and mental health. It’s still hard though, but I’m getting better at it (except when it comes to chocolate- that’s still considerably hard).

  8. Do you – it’s easy to get sucked in by people’s lives on social media – for the longest time I’ve compared my blog or content to others and always felt like mine came up short, however, I’ve since learned that we’re all different, we all have different lives and we all have different stories to tell. I love inspiring people with my testimony – I believe that God saved my life for His glory and my testimony will always be a part of who I am.

Those are some things I wanted to share with you since hitting the mid-30 mark. I wanted to make it a list of 10 ( I mean who makes a list of 8 things) – (adulting is also making a lot of lists about stuff) but I’ve reached my philosophical quota for the day so that’ll have to do.

Thank you for reading and stay sassy xxx

Top: Makro | Pants: Old | Shoes: MRP | Bag: Old | Earrings: ByMissVoe (she’s got all the good stuff y’all – go check it out!)

Deliver ME from ME!

I’ve been on a journey of self discovery for most of the year (probably for most of my life hahahaha) – hence the sparse blog posts & #OOTDs or any sort of active social media life for that matter. 

It started with my spiritual walk, then having to relearn & reaffirm some truths about myself (especially after gaining back all the weight I lost last year) – I’m still learning – then came the decision to join the natural hair movement (NOT as easy as I assumed) –  spiritually, physically & mentally a lot was/is going on but the most prominent lesson I’m learning over and over is that I am my only hinderance. I am in my own way! 

My state of mind, the way I see myself – and I don’t just mean physically – it restricts me in every way in every area. Allowing fear, insecurities and a negative self image to cripple me. Constantly second guessing myself and doubting my abilities, living in a loop de loop of self-doubt & self shame. It’s time I break the cycle!!! 

I challenged myself to take these pics & do a blog post – totally unprepared – I had to get out of my own head , go against the grain, regardless of the weight I’ve gained or how I think I look with my big “boskop/kroeskop” because let me tell you, going natural has challenged every thought and every belief I had about myself, my appearance and my self image – Yes…hair…hair can do that!!! It’s a good thing though – it’s pushed me further out of my comfort zone – literally forcing me to embrace my truth! 

So with big arms, big hips and my now big hair – I smiled (a genuine happy smile) and posed for the camera! 

I’m big and that’s how I am right now. And this is who I am right now. And I want to live right now!!! I’m tired of hiding behind extra weight or heat damaged hair or jiggly thighs – constantly obsessing about the bathroom scale, shying away from cameras…NO… life is happening and I want to live it! 

This past week we said goodbye to 2 friends, 1 went to bed and never woke up – she wasn’t even 45yrs old – the other succumbed to injuries he sustained in a car crash – only 25yrs old – life is too short Lauren, quit fretting the small stuff! 

So this is me – boskoppy, saggy booby (I’m a mom of 3 & I probably could do with some new bras LoL – but good heavens who sets the prices for bras?!?!? – must be a man), big thighed & flabby armed – it’s me and it’s always going to be me, well, atleast physically maybe, BUT there’s another ME inside this ME and that ME is growing & learning everyday & in this moment, somehow, that’s enough! 


Leggings & Tunic: The Fix | Bag: MRP | Sandals: Gifted 

Lu 

xoxo 

My kinda LBD

  
These days I prefer loose, flowy dresses over anything even slightly clingy. I don’t go anywhere near my jeans or any kind of pants for that matter – it’s just too hot for that kinda commitment LOL!

And like I’ve mentioned in a previous post, you can never go wrong with a black dress.

I had this one custom made by the talented ladies at Fleur Fashion House – I also have the same dress in grey – you can have a look here.

  

    
    
    
    
   
Dress – Fleur Fashion House | Sandals & Neckpiece – MrP | Earrings – Truworths 

My 6yr old takes such lovely pics, except for the ugly lawn mower in the back hahaha!

PS: Check my son attempting to clean the garden – such a busy boy ❀️

Fashion Term Of The Day:

AppliquΓ© 

Definition: A decorative design made of one piece of fabric sewn on top of another. 

Stay Sassy xxx

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