Deliver ME from ME!

I’ve been on a journey of self discovery for most of the year (probably for most of my life hahahaha) – hence the sparse blog posts & #OOTDs or any sort of active social media life for that matter. 

It started with my spiritual walk, then having to relearn & reaffirm some truths about myself (especially after gaining back all the weight I lost last year) – I’m still learning – then came the decision to join the natural hair movement (NOT as easy as I assumed) –  spiritually, physically & mentally a lot was/is going on but the most prominent lesson I’m learning over and over is that I am my only hinderance. I am in my own way! 

My state of mind, the way I see myself – and I don’t just mean physically – it restricts me in every way in every area. Allowing fear, insecurities and a negative self image to cripple me. Constantly second guessing myself and doubting my abilities, living in a loop de loop of self-doubt & self shame. It’s time I break the cycle!!! 

I challenged myself to take these pics & do a blog post – totally unprepared – I had to get out of my own head , go against the grain, regardless of the weight I’ve gained or how I think I look with my big “boskop/kroeskop” because let me tell you, going natural has challenged every thought and every belief I had about myself, my appearance and my self image – Yes…hair…hair can do that!!! It’s a good thing though – it’s pushed me further out of my comfort zone – literally forcing me to embrace my truth! 

So with big arms, big hips and my now big hair – I smiled (a genuine happy smile) and posed for the camera! 

I’m big and that’s how I am right now. And this is who I am right now. And I want to live right now!!! I’m tired of hiding behind extra weight or heat damaged hair or jiggly thighs – constantly obsessing about the bathroom scale, shying away from cameras…NO… life is happening and I want to live it! 

This past week we said goodbye to 2 friends, 1 went to bed and never woke up – she wasn’t even 45yrs old – the other succumbed to injuries he sustained in a car crash – only 25yrs old – life is too short Lauren, quit fretting the small stuff! 

So this is me – boskoppy, saggy booby (I’m a mom of 3 & I probably could do with some new bras LoL – but good heavens who sets the prices for bras?!?!? – must be a man), big thighed & flabby armed – it’s me and it’s always going to be me, well, atleast physically maybe, BUT there’s another ME inside this ME and that ME is growing & learning everyday & in this moment, somehow, that’s enough! 


Leggings & Tunic: The Fix | Bag: MRP | Sandals: Gifted 

Lu 

xoxo 

I forget but God…

Hey Beautiful People 

Here’s a funny story…not funny like ha ha but you know…

My confidence as a person and as a blogger has taken a serious beating since gaining weight. Last year I was able to drop a good amount of weight – not really intentionally though – I had a really trying year, my personal & spiritual life were a mess, I was stressed and depressed and honestly, I hardly ate. I’m a happy eater – so therefore we can conclude that I am happy a lot of the time…ha ha! 

Because of this I’ve been unmotivated to blog or even shop – I’m sure many of you can relate – but God has a way of always reminding me where He’s brought me from. 


This morning I picked up this stethoscope for a cousin (her kid needed 1 for a school project) but it instantly reminded me of the time I was expecting Aimee. 

A little scene-setting…

I’d had a weight loss op done a few years prior to falling pregnant and I wasn’t in very good health. I started off at 63kgs in the beginning of my pregnancy and by the 7th month I’d dropped to 40kgs. I was sick, in constant pain, I wasn’t eating and numerous times I contemplated suicide (the pain was that bad). I remember being in such tremendous pain and speaking such horrible words during my pregnancy – death, abortion, suicide – to name a few and yet at the same time I prayed that little Aimee would make it. 

I purchased 1 of these stethoscopes because I was so afraid that she’d die inside my womb. The pain would keep me awake at night and I’d lie there with my stethoscope trying to make sure I could hear her heart beat – I’m not sure if I did hear it – but that’s what I did! 

Aimee had to be delivered prematurely, she just wasn’t thriving inside my womb so at 7months she was born at a tiny 1.4kgs – literally just skin and bone. She stayed in Neo ICU for close to 3 weeks and it was the hardest 3 weeks of my life. I blamed myself for everything that happened to her – it was all those terrible things I spoke over her – I’d say – but I was in so much pain that I just wasn’t thinking clearly – I know that’s no excuse though! 


This was a month before Aimee was delivered ☝🏽


Today God reminded me of His awesome, miracle-working power. He reminded me where He brought me from ( a dying bed in Milpark ICU), He reminded me that my story, my message, is so much more than anything as superficial as my weight. I look at Aimee and I’m in awe of Him – that even in my weakness, my pain, my sickness, He had a plan for us. I am so much more than the number on the back of my jeans. 

I’ll be doing a blog post on my story soon!


Thank You for the reminder Lord. 

Stay Slayin & Stay Prayin y’all 

Lu xxx 

1 Year Blogiversary!!!

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Wow!!!! All About That Bass turns 1 – that’s right – 1 year ago I hit the publish button on my very 1st post. I had no idea what to expect as I set off on this blogging adventure, all I knew was that I had a deep desire to reach out to those who thought that you had to look a certain way to look or feel beautiful.

It wasn’t (and still isn’t) about the likes or comments or the number of followers – NO – it’s never about something as superficial as that – this blog was birthed from a desire to uplift and inspire women just like me – who often measure their worth by the number on the scale.

Looking back on the past year – I have to admit – this blog has forced me to grow in ways I never imagined. It has been such an amazing journey of learning, sharing, friendship and most of all gratitude!

Every e- mail subscriber, Facebook “like”, share and comment!

Everyone who follows me on Instagram and Pinterest!

All of the likes, pins and comments on the posts I’ve shared!

The sweet bloggers who include me in their blogroll!

A huge and heart-warming THANK YOU!

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To celebrate, I will be giving away these 3 Revlon products to 1 lucky reader, all you have to do to enter is comment on this post and tell me what you love most about this blog!

(Please note – only people in S.A)

 

Thank you for reading & remember to stay sassy

Lu

xxx

 

 

 

 

My kinda LBD

  
These days I prefer loose, flowy dresses over anything even slightly clingy. I don’t go anywhere near my jeans or any kind of pants for that matter – it’s just too hot for that kinda commitment LOL!

And like I’ve mentioned in a previous post, you can never go wrong with a black dress.

I had this one custom made by the talented ladies at Fleur Fashion House – I also have the same dress in grey – you can have a look here.

  

    
    
    
    
   
Dress – Fleur Fashion House | Sandals & Neckpiece – MrP | Earrings – Truworths 

My 6yr old takes such lovely pics, except for the ugly lawn mower in the back hahaha!

PS: Check my son attempting to clean the garden – such a busy boy ❤️

Fashion Term Of The Day:

Appliqué 

Definition: A decorative design made of one piece of fabric sewn on top of another. 

Stay Sassy xxx

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I love Hues 

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Finally, Spring is upon us!

Yeah, we thought that about a week ago, but then Mother Nature was like, “nah just kidding, it’s still cold!”

Well it’s certainly resembling Spring time now.

I love the print and the hues of this dress. I’ve paired it with a textured blazer since it’s still a wee bit nippy especially in the early mornings.

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My hair is so frustrating right now! Let me tell you, transitioning to natural hair IS NOT for the faint hearted! Shoooweee! It takes oodles of patience – which I’m running out of fast! I think I did my hair 9 times this morning?!? I’m so sick of this bun life (apologies to my natural sisters) I know, I know, it’s a protective style and all and there are tons of styles I could try out, I’m just lacking inspiration at this point. I’m a newbie – don’t judge!

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Style Breakdown:

Dress, blazer, shoes, bag, sunnies – Mr P

Earrings – Truworths

 

Here’s another Fun Fashion Fact:

“All women should be thanking Mary Phelps, a New York socialite, for creating the modern bra. The ones she made and patented in 1914 were very unlike the ones we wear today, though. Hers were made of handkerchiefs.” 

 Thanks Mary – the ‘girls’ appreciate your invention 😊

Stay Cute xxx

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Little Lotta 


Little Lotta was a nickname given to me when I was a little girl by an older cousin.

About Little Lotta…


Little Lotta Plump was a fictional character published by Harvey Comics, the same publishers of the famous Richie Rich comics. In fact, Little Lotta appeared in many Richie Rich adventures.


Lotta Plump, has an obsession with (drum roll…) food! Her insatiable appetite (being her defining characteristic) however, doesn’t make her on obese slob, but rather, the more Lotta eats, the stronger she becomes, giving rise to superhuman strength. Lotta is depicted as friendly, kind-hearted and readily uses her tremendous strength to do good.

Lotta has a boyfriend, Gerald, who is the complete opposite (physically). Gerald is a tiny, shy, nerdy-type of guy. Together with Lotta, the twosome go on many adventures.

About Lauren as Little Lotta…

I can’t tell you how much I hated that nickname (little Lotta)  when I was growing up  (mind you I didn’t care much for the person who gave it to me either).

Obviously my cousin was referencing my weight when he gave me the name (because everyone knows that all fat people spend their days stuffing their faces with copious amounts food right?!?!)  For years that name gave rise to many negative emotions, especially when I knew I’d be seeing said cousin.

It wasn’t until recently that I actually learned more about Little Lotta’s character. Like the fact that she was friendly and kind-hearted. Or the fact that she used her strength to good in her community. The fact that she didn’t care how silly she and Gerald looked together. Or that people thought he was diminutive and weak. Lotta didn’t let her bullies get the better of her. No, she did what she deemed good regardless of anyone’s opinion.

So to you, my ‘dear’ cousin, thank you for the nickname. I own it now.

I am indeed friendly and kind-hearted. I am now using my strength to uplift and inspire many women, especially in the Plus Size community. I don’t care that my husband weighs half of what I do, and I certainly don’t care if people think we look odd together. I will no longer allow bullies, like yourself, to diminish me for looking different. I AM DIFFERENT DAMNIT! I will continue doing what I deem good – regardless of anyone’s opinion (even Nicole Arbour’s) AND I’ll do in style!

Me and my Gerald…  image image image image image image image image

Style Breakdown:

Cardigan – PEP Stores

Top – Truworths

Ripped Jeans, earrings, necklace & bag – Mr P

Shoes – Makro_SA

Sunnies – China Town

Lips – LA Girls Matte gloss in Tulle

Hair – you know my signature bun by now!

Here’s a Fun Fashion Fact:

Napoleon wasn’t just about war. He contributed to fashion in many ways too. The reason we have buttons on the sleeves of our jackets is because Napoleon got tired of his soldiers wiping their noses on their sleeves. 

Hope you enjoyed this post!

Stay Cute xxx

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